Seasons change, one by one, and then–before we know it–a whole year has gone by and the cycle starts anew. And, as anyone who has read my essays on the topic of seasonal living already knows, I am all about going with the flow of time and season. I’m not too fond of the popular culture and marketing push of “New-Year-new-you” stories though. They’re not necessarily helpful if you honestly do want to make some meaningful change in your life. There really is more to it than arbitrary dates, don’t you think?
Change is a process that has a push-and-pull rhythm to it that may or may not fit neatly into the slot created by the first day of a new year. But not to worry; you do have options. As I tell my patients: the Chinese Lunar New Year is in February, so if you don’t adhere seamlessly to your January 1st goals, you still have a do-over. Your resolutions are part of the larger fabric of your life and yes, you do have more agency than you might recognize. All it takes is some meaningful creativity and a worthwhile plan.
Think of life as a tapestry, one that is created in part by you and what you do and constructed upon a canvas that your forebears handed down to you.
Now is a good time to gather the loose ends, don’t you think? Can you sit quietly for a moment and visualize your own unique and individual canvas… Can you look and identify what you want to keep and what you want to relinquish? Are there any hanging threads you want to snip or knots that need tying? What kind of goals do you want to set for yourself? The following are the ones that I think are healthy, realistic, and worth attempting. Let’s see what you think about them.
*****
*****
Goal: Be kinder to yourself
Self-compassion is somewhat like self-care. It can be meaningful and healing and it has its more frivolous and even almost damaging component. There is a difference between knowing yourself and taking good care vs. having an excuse for everything and not owning your own material. The first is self-compassion and the second? That’s another story and not necessarily a good one. To develop a practice that is more the first and less the second requires dedication and patience.
If you could pause for five minutes and sit with your inner landscape, what do you see and feel? Is there a judgmental voice telling you that you are ______________ [fill in the blank with your self-criticism of choice]? Maybe you feel squirmy and start telling yourself that you have errands to run and things to do and a cell phone to check. It can be challenging to sit with ourselves, but doing so is an act of self-care and compassion. When we see ourselves clearly and without judgement, we are better able to decide what we need.
Some days, what’s needed is a gentle kick in the pants and some focus. Other days, the best bet is to rest. Developing self-discipline and healthy habits is much easier when we know our own boundaries and we know when to be kind. If you are gathering up loose ends, then, the question here relates to what old messages you want to keep and which of the less-healthy ones to do you want to relinquish. If you are ready to treat yourself like you would your own best friend, what kind of advice or support would you be giving yourself right now?
If self-kindness were a thread running through your tapestry, what color would it be? Do you have enough of it? What does self-kindness mean to you, and to your larger picture?
*****
*****
Goal: Learn something new about your own health
We all have our narratives about our own health and wellbeing. Some are fairly straightforward and probably accurate. If you’re allergic to penicillin or your mom got hives if she ate tomatoes, that’s not laden with nuance. It just is, and you work around it. Other things are more pernicious, like being taught that weight equals worth and that letting yourself get heavy is a display of moral failure. And then there are the mixed stories that have some use at the same time that they are, in fact, damaging.
I think the biggest one is that health is what you get at your doctor’s office and that, if you don’t go to the doctor regularly then… too bad. No health for you, sir! None for you either, ma’am! (But does your tapestry need this thread? Maybe this is one to clip and repurpose…).
We come into this world with a degree of health (or lack thereof) granted by our genetic inheritance. We nurture and construct upon that edifice by way of our environment and our lifestyle choices. Sometimes, we are fortunate and others amongst us have to work a lot harder to gain even less, but ultimately, the choices we make do contribute to our wellbeing. Doctors can help with that, and advances in medical science make it easier for biomedicine to do more and more to benefit each one of us. But ultimately, you are with yourself every day. The doctor isn’t an all-seeing parent who dispenses just the right prescription so that each patient achieves their best version of health.
I hold that an educated patient is a strong patient. In my estimation, the best thing anyone can do about their own health is two-fold. First, self-knowledge is key. What are your strengths? Where are your weaknesses? What of either category are genetic? What is the result of habit and lifestyle choice? Secondly, understanding of one’s vulnerable areas is also key. If you already know that diabetes runs in your family then start now and make it part of your life project to learn about how diabetes works, what a person can do to avoid it, and how different approaches work at different stages of life (for example).
When you know yourself, you are compassionate with yourself, and you mindfully learn about your own needs for wellbeing, then you are that much more able to plan and succeed at your health goals. As you tie up the loose ends of this topic, my question for you–again–is what will you keep and what needs to change?
*****
*****
Goal: Become attentive to the bigger picture surrounding you
Chinese medical philosophy holds that human beings are the middle piece between Heaven (which is yang) and Earth (which is yin). People are reflective of their environment and the environment is reflective of people. Everything is connected.
Your life’s journey is a combination of events and occurrences that affect you and those around you. It’s also a blip within the much larger perspective of your generation as a whole. What will this historical moment look like when it’s recreated in the next century? Where are you situated in this big picture?
Where do you want to be next year? What about in ten years? If you are still with me on the tapestry metaphor, where are you now…what does your path look like today… and how will you shift gears as you create a bolder, brighter, and more vibrant manifestation of your wellbeing?
The end of an old year and the beginning of a new one, or your birthday, or some other big event’s anniversary, are all great opportunities to explore a bit of perspective, time-wise and regarding where you hope to be in future. It’s a moment that invites hope, too. When we choose wisely, and tie up the loose ends that trip us up or fly about and distract, we move forward with greater confidence. Just about anything is possible with the right strategy, helpful guidance, some luck, and the proper amount of diligence.
*****
*****
Creating new pathways
Are you ready to create something new on the tapestry of your life? If you are, then the next question relates to your resources. Who are the helpers in your life, the guides and the inspirations and the teachers? If you’re not sure where to begin, or maybe you have tried a variety of options and not gotten where you want to go, then (no surprise here), my suggestion is to consider either seeing what Chinese medicine can do for you or–if your primary goal is lifestyle change–then perhaps working with a health coach is the way to finally achieve your goals.
People are usually familiar with the idea of life and business coaches, but for whatever reason, health coaches are a little less well-known. This is a shame, because working with a health coach can help you to find resources within yourself that you might never have considered. A health coach can ask you the right questions and help you to dig deep as you identify your goals, your values, and your path forward. They can be there for you as you hit the same roadblocks that have tripped you up so many times before…only this time, you have the support and structure to overcome them once and for all.
Your health coach is the one who can look at your tapestry and help you to help yourself to choose new threads. You may be too entangled in your own story to know which way to turn, and your health coach should be the one to coax a new story and a changed direction from you.
*****
*****
The term “acupuncturist” covers a lot of ground. Generally, most practitioners of Chinese medicine aren’t just acupuncturists. We’re also herbalists, most of us, and some of us also offer manual therapy, or tui na (pronounced “twee nah,” this is like massage and akin to acupressure, and it is heavenly). Still others can treat you via breath and movement, or qigong, and most of do provide nutritional guidance. If you are interested in Chinese medicine, you have options. It’s not the same as a health coaching session, but your practitioner will usually be able to discuss lifestyle change with you as well.
What are you looking to accomplish in this upcoming season and new year? A health coach will work with you to make your choices and changes. A practitioner of Chinese medicine will assess your health, hear your concerns and goals, and treat you with your wellbeing in mind, either via acupuncture or another of the above-mentioned modalities. You’re working on your tapestry yourself, but with guidance, in the first scenario; in the second, your practitioner might be the one to clip or tie or choose a thread. Ultimately, though, your path forward shifts, and so does your landscape.
This is the beginning of a change but I see it as the beginning of a practice run that has space until the Chinese lunar new year and beyond. It’s always nice to make lasting change right away, but fate and destiny don’t always follow the calendar. Having some padding between yourself and your goals makes it easier to practice and learn. And generally, if you stick with your program, you will have achieved some of the goals in February that you struggled with in January. You just do so in a self-kindly way.
And self-kindness is a cornerstone of any healing journey, don’t you think?
*****
*****
Dr. Paula Bruno, Ph.D., L.Ac., is a licensed acupuncturist and herbalist, an AOBTA-CP traditional Chinese bodywork therapist, a health coach, and an author. She maintains an active and growing practice at her Austin, TX office. Dr. Bruno is also available for distance appointments for wellness consultation or coaching.
In her first career, she was a Spanish professor.
Dr. Bruno’s specialties as a Chinese medicine practitioner include: • Musculoskeletal health (acute or chronic pain relief; Ehlers Danlos syndrome & hypermobility support) • Digestive support, gut health, and weight loss • Aesthetic treatment, including scar revision • Men’s health • General preventive care and wellness support for all persons.
She is the author of Chinese Medicine and the Management of Hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Syndrome: A Practitioner’s Guide. Dr. Bruno also maintains a second website, holistichealthandheds.com, with resources and information curated specifically for people with hEDS and HSD.
When you are ready to discover what traditional medicine plus a vibrant and engaged approach to holistic health can do for you, either contact Dr. Bruno or book an appointment online.
*****
Two Hearts Wellness does not accept paid advertising on this website
Note: Material on this web site site is not intended to diagnose, prevent, treat, or cure any disease, illness, or ailment. A Chinese medicine practitioner in Texas identifies syndrome patterns but does not diagnose illness. Material on this web site does not purport to identify syndrome patterns.
*****
*****
Two Hearts Wellness 